


A Perfect Date?

by Lovethistoomuch



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Blood, Dancing, First Kiss, Implied/Referenced Torture, Injured Leonard "Bones" McCoy, M/M, Mind Meld, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 09:55:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28918683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lovethistoomuch/pseuds/Lovethistoomuch
Summary: When asked to attend a celebratory ball after a successful mission, Spock proposes that it is only logical for him and the Doctor to attend together. This way he does not have to occupy his mind further with who he is going to bring as a partner. But maybe there are other motives at play as well?Either way, the evening does not quite go like either of them had expected...
Relationships: Leonard "Bones" McCoy/Spock
Comments: 12
Kudos: 68
Collections: Spones Reverse Big Bang (2020-2021)





	A Perfect Date?

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written for the Spones Reverse Big Bang 2020-2021
> 
> The following art that inspired this fic was drawn by the incredibly talented and wonderful [lumesatii](https://lumesatii.tumblr.com/) who inspired me throughut the process.

"I cannot thank you enough, Captain!", Shaw Hyralto said taking the Captain's hand with a bright smile.

“Well, it was really a team effort”, Kirk responded politely, Looking at his first officer and chief surgeon: “With the help of their respective teams, doctor McCoy and Mr. Spock worked day and night to get the antidote to you as fast as possible.”

At the mention of his name, McCoy started bouncing on his heels. He always got nervous when he was being praised.

“If only all of our citizens could appreciate your good effort...”, Hyralto replied, his face turning grim for a moment.

“I'm sure they will come around as soon as they see how well it works”, Kirk assured him: “We will supply you with as many dosages as we can. Mr. Spock has calculated the best distribution pattern for you.”

Hyralto looked at the Vulcan. “Again”, he said: “I cannot thank you enough!”

There was a short pause as the leader of the alien planet seemed to think. “I would like to arrange a small feast in your honour. It is a tradition for my people to celebrate the passing of grave danger with a ball and a dance around the fire. We would be honoured if you could join us!”

“I'd have to clear it with headquarters first but it would be a pleasure!”, Kirk said.

“That goes for you two as well, Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy.”

“Thank you”, McCoy replied politely and Spock made a nodding gesture with his head.

McCoy thought that after the last few days of non-stop work, he could use some rest. However, the following words totally ruined any joy he had felt at the prospect of music and alcohol.

“Please bring a partner, a loved one. Attending alone, in our tradition, means bad luck.”

When they returned to the ship, Kirk shot his friends a sympathetic look. He knew how hard they had worked on this. “Alright”, he said: “You two go to bed.” As McCoy opened his mouth, Kirk raised his finger at him: “No objections. I'll contact headquarters and ask for extended stay. I'm certain they will grant it, given our diplomatic mission and the prospect of this world as a future ally. I don't want to see any reports from you before at least tomorrow.” He waited till he got a nod from both of them. “Alright. Good night, gentlemen!”

“Good night, Captain.”

“Night, Jim.”

The first person Kirk called when he got to his quarters was Scotty. “Mr. Scott”, he said: “We have approximately 24 hours in orbit of this planet without a particular mission that involves the Enterprise. I trust you know what to do with that time?”

Scotty's smile on the other end of the call was noticeable in his voice. “Aye Captain, I do.”

“Alright, Kirk out.”

He sighed and leaned back in his chair. He waited only for a moment, before sitting back up and writing a short report with a request to Starfleet Command. As soon as that was finished, he took his own advice and went to sleep.

McCoy was very tired but he made a few notes before going to bed. Jim would get his report tomorrow, no problem. As soon as he lay down on the mattress, he immediately fell asleep. It was only the next day that McCoy remembered what they had agreed upon last night.

Who was he going to ask to go to the ball with him? And was that even his decision to make? Maybe Jim or headquarters would just appoint someone. They were not here to have fun, after all.

Of course, McCoy knew who he wanted to ask. There was only one person on board, he would like to go to this kind of an event with but that was completely out of the question!

Suddenly, the buzzer for his door went off. Without having any idea who that might be, McCoy walked towards it. As the door opened, his eyes widened. _Speak of the devil_ , he thought.

Spock, as usual, showed no reaction to his surprise. “Doctor”, he said: “May I come in?” But McCoy had already stepped aside.

“I've been meaning to discuss this matter with you, first thing in the morning”, Spock said as soon as the door had shut behind him automatically.

McCoy crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. “And what might that be?”, he asked. Unlike him, Spock was already wearing his uniform shirt, so he assumed it was something official.

Spock rarely came to his quarters. They already saw too much of each other during work and even though McCoy had invited Spock for drinks a couple of times, the Vulcan had never accepted. It only hurt McCoy a bit, since he also knew that Spock didn't usually drink.

“I assume you do not yet have a partner for tonight?”, Spock inquired.

McCoy raised an eyebrow at that and gave a slight nod. “You assume correctly.” _Where was this going?_ , he wondered.

“Then I would like to make the proposition that we go together.” Spock's voice sounded calm as always. He was almost purposefully holding eye contact as if to ensure that he got every bit of the Doctor's reaction, whatever that reaction might be. His dark eyes were very focused and McCoy was really glad, that he himself was leaning against the wall right now. He blinked, three times more than necessary.

“What?”

McCoy could have sworn that Spock's features hardened a bit and he only now realised the frown on his own face. _Damn!_ , he thought. Here was Spock, actually proposing they do something together and McCoy was probably looking at him like he was some test tube he had left in the incubator for too long.

Before he could correct his mistake, Spock spoke again. “It is only logical”, he stated: “You and I are both senior officers, so any requests of this kind that we make to our subordinates could be viewed as unprofessional.” McCoy grit his teeth at that explanation, all his remorse forgotten in an instant. “There are also more important things that require my attention right now than to further occupy my mind with this matter”, Spock continued.

McCoy decided to smile at that. In all honesty, he was too used to this kind of treatment to actually be surprised. “How charming”, he responded: “You really know how to make a man feel special!”

As he saw Spock raise his eyebrow, he shook his head in resignation. “Fine, you convinced me. I don't want to think about this anymore either. We'll go together and that's it. But please try to look at least a bit like I wasn't your last choice for this...”

There was a pause and also a slight shift on Spock's face. If he hadn't known better, McCoy would have described it as puzzlement. “On the contrary, Doctor. You were the first person aboard this ship I asked.”

“I know.” McCoy wanted to hit himself. Why did he always have to be such a damn fool!? “Anything else?”

“Not at the moment.”

“Alright.”

They stared at each other again but they were both wearing their masks now. Spock was being emotionless and McCoy discontent.

“I'll see you tonight, Doctor.” With that, Spock finished whatever staring contest was happening between them and left.

McCoy stayed in his exact spot even after the door had closed. He shut his eyes and raised his right hand to his temple. He was probably getting a headache...

After he had gotten the okay from Starfleet, Kirk went directly to the bridge and walked towards the communication station. “Lieutenant Uhura, may I speak to you for a moment?”

She took out her earpiece and looked at him. “Yes, Captain?”

“Would you be interested in accompanying me to the festivities on the alien planet tonight? They requested that we bring partners and who better to choose than our chief communications officer?”

Uhura smiled at him. “I'll gladly accept that offer, Captain.”

“Perfect! Now, please tell Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy that I'm expecting them in my quarters.”

“Yes, Captain.”

It didn't take long for them to arrive and they did so at roughly the same time.

“Morning”, Kirk said and made a pause for them to return the greeting: “I have gotten a response from headquarters. They approve of us attending the festivities as part of our diplomatic mission. They also instructed me to pick appropriate personal as our respective partners, so I asked Lieutenant Uhura to accompany me. You are free to choose whomever you want but keep in mind that this is still part of our duty.” He smiled a bit at that and they both knew that he had been speaking as their Captain, not their friend. “However,” he continued in a more casual tone: “If you got eyes on someone, I'm the last person to forbid it.” He winked more at McCoy than Spock.

From the corner of his eye, McCoy could see Spock looking at him for only a very short moment. Then, the Vulcan spoke. “Further arrangements will not be necessary, Captain”, Spock said, his voice as precise as always: “Doctor McCoy and I have already agreed to attend the event together.”

Kirk's eyes widened but not too much. There was still a hint of a smile in the corners of his mouth. “I see...”, he said: “This was your idea, I presume?”

Spock still showed no sign of emotion but McCoy grit his teeth. He wanted to make a quip but couldn't think of anything to say. The expression on Jim's face made him uneasy.

“That is correct, Captain”, the Vulcan affirmed, but for only the fraction of a second, he avoided eye contact and that was all that Kirk needed to know. He smiled warmly.

Spock's face seemed to harden a bit at that. He tilted his head slightly. McCoy shot him a quick look but the Vulcan didn't seem to notice. “It was a purely logical decision”, he stated. And the smile finally disappeared from the Captain's face.

“Oh, I know!”, Kirk reassured him earnestly.

Spock nodded. “Was that all, Captain?”

“Yes.”

“Then I'll see you tonight.” He nodded in McCoy's direction. “Doctor.”

“Spock.”

As soon as he had left, Kirk shook his head. The slight smile was back.

McCoy stared at him, his blue eyes not kind but piercing. “Oh, shut up!”, he snapped and Kirk rose his hands in a defensive gesture. He still looked way too amused for the fact that one of his best friends was staring daggers at him right now.

“I didn't say anything”, Kirk pointed out.

“No, but you wanted to.” McCoy felt hot, ready to boil over: “I can see it in your face!”

A pause followed this statement. Kirk remained silent.

“Damn you!”, McCoy finally spat out: “It's not like that!”

“But you want it to be.” It was said as a fact and McCoy glared at him even harder. “Look at how angry you are. If it wasn't so, you'd be gone already, but here you are still...”

Kirk looked stern. There was a reason he was so good at playing poker with various opponents, alien or human.

“Fine!”, McCoy threw up his arms in a gesture of resignation: “But it doesn't matter either way! Cause when he asked me, he gave me a whole list of reasons for his decision, one more unflattering than the other! He doesn't really want to go with me, he just didn't want to be bothered with this any more. And given that most of the crew are already enamoured with him and his complicated psyche, I cannot blame him for choosing me. This way he will at least not give anyone false hope...” McCoy stopped, looking at the ground.

The more he had spoken, the bitterer he had sounded. Kirk had to be careful now, he knew that. But maybe there was a way of making McCoy see what he himself saw.

“Do you remember what Sarek gave as a reason for marrying Spock's mother?”, Kirk asked and McCoy's head shot up in surprise at the seemingly abrupt change of topic.

“Why?”

“He said it was a logical decision”, Kirk reminded him, studying his friend's face to see if he was getting what he was implying.

Maybe he was, because he frowned almost immediately. “That is something completely different!”

“Is it?”

They looked at each other, both thinking about it. At last, McCoy shook his head. “You're wrong, Jim”, he said. And before the other man could object to that, the doctor continued: “Don't give me hope. Not with this. I can't...” He looked down, then up again. “I can't, Jim.”

“I'm sorry,” Kirk looked almost as sad as his friend. He wanted to say more but didn't dare to. He was sure that he was right about this but he needed something better than that. He needed to _know_. After the defeated tone in his friend's voice, the totally broken expression in his eyes and the way his whole body had lost its energy just now, he needed to know for sure before he gave him any hope at all. “I'll see you tonight”, Kirk said and McCoy nodded.

“Alright.”

It puzzled him how he hadn't realised this earlier: McCoy's deep feelings for Spock, Spock's obvious feelings for the doctor. Maybe it had needed something like this to fully open his eyes to it, but now, Kirk could not look away again. He was determined to keep an eye on them both tonight and confirm his suspicions about Spock. And then he had to do something. He was tired of seeing his friends miserable!

They all arrived in the transporter room together, wearing their dress uniforms. With no belt for equipment, only Kirk had a communicator on him, concealed under his jacket. McCoy and Spock did not look at each other. There was a clear tension between them and it seemed to be going both ways. Kirk couldn't hold back a small smirk. This was going to be an interesting evening for sure! He shot a look at Uhura to see if she had the same reaction as him and got a wide eyed, slightly surprised look from her. Apparently, he wasn't the only person who sensed that something was up.

“Energise”, Kirk said.

They had gotten the coordinates earlier from Hyralto, so they beamed down without any problems. It was a relatively secluded area on a mountaintop, where the festivities traditionally took place and a short walk from their beam down location.

By now, it had gotten dark as in the sense that the small sun illuminating the surface of this planet for a few hours each day had gone down but night was a little different here. In absence of external light, many of the species on this planet had developed glowing features and they were giving off a light, silver shimmer.

Maybe it was reflecting moonlight. All McCoy knew was that they had taken some samples back to the Enterprise for analysis and that it was totally beautiful! He had marked down this planet in his head as an ideal location for shore leave since the glowing blossoms on flowers and trees must certainly have a relaxing effect on people who were not currently in his position.

Spock also seemed very focused, not really paying their surroundings any attention, while Kirk let his eyes wander a bit and Uhura seemed totally enamoured with everything.

“I'm glad you took me with you, Captain”, she said: “This planet is incredible!”

Kirk shot her a quick smile. “It really is.”

The other two stayed silent.

Soon they reached their destination. It was a broad, round space with a heap of piled up wood in the middle that would surely be lit during the course of the evening. All around this inner circle were the same trees they had seen on their way here, with glowing blossoms that gave the place a truly magical feeling. Even though no lamps were lit the place was illuminated with cool, calming light.

As soon as he saw them arrive, Hyralto walked towards them. He was wearing a dark gown with glowing embroidery that was different to the clothes of all the other attendees. He smiled and greeted Kirk and Uhura warmly, but then his expression changed a bit as he noticed Spock and McCoy behind him.

“My dear friends”, Hyralto said: “I don't mean to sound rude but did I not stress the importance of bringing a partner to this special feast?”

“You did”, Spock stated immediately: “And I can assure you that we fully respect your traditions! Doctor McCoy and I will function as each others partners for this evening.”

Hyralto's expression immediately changed into a warm smile. “Oh, of course!”, he said: “Forgive me.”

“No reason to apologise”, McCoy said but he sounded a little bitter as if he had totally missed the look of sudden understanding that had spread across their host's face. In this moment, Kirk wondered if 'pessimist at heart' McCoy would even recognise a positive hint if it hit him right in the face. Probably not...

“You are very gracious by letting us be part of your festivities”, Kirk said: “Please lead the way and tell us what to expect and how to behave since this is all new to us.”

Hyralto smiled at that and nodded. “This way, friends”, he said. “First there will be the ceremonious lighting of the fire. We will all stand in a circle, holding each other's hands while the pyre is lit. Then we will tell words of thanks to our partner who has helped us through these trying times and dance with them around the fire. I am sure you have dances like ours on your home planets Captain.”

Kirk made a half nodding gesture with his head. “Probably.” He didn't look back to see how his friends were taking this news. He could imagine their expressions well enough.

McCoy hated this! He hated it even more than he had imagined. Well, he had imagined he would enjoy it at least a bit but he didn't. He'd have to hold Spock's hand and then dance with him and the whole time they would be surrounded by magical lights that looked like they stemmed right out of a fairytale. What had he been thinking? From the stern expression on the Vulcan's face, he was probably having similar thoughts right now, only for other reasons...

“Please welcome our honoured guests!”, Hyralto proclaimed to the people who were already gathered around the Pyre: “And make room for them so that they may join in our ritual.”

As the people did what they were told, Kirk made sure to position himself on the other side of Spock. When they saw everyone taking each others hands, Kirk shot a questioning look at the Vulcan. Spock responded with a short nod and Kirk took his hand.

Spock looked at McCoy who was standing on his other side. The doctor seemed incredibly tense, like every muscle in his body was contracted. If he had known about the effects of his request on his friend, Spock would probably not have asked him. The most troubling thing was, that he didn't know anything about the source of the doctor's discomfort. He wouldn't have made the request if there wasn't at least a part of him that thought, McCoy would appreciate it. Humans, especially McCoy, were sometimes very puzzling.

“Doctor?”, Spock said, stretching out his hand: “Is this alright for you?”

McCoy's head made a very sharp turn, staring at him as if he'd just stepped on his foot. “Alright for me?”, he hissed: “Is it alright for you?”

Spock could feel the muscles in his face shift. “Of course it is”, he said emphatically and took the other man's hand before he could protest. McCoy blushed. His hand was very warm. Suddenly, Spock could feel some heat in his own cheeks. Maybe this hadn't been such a smart idea after all...

McCoy squeezed his hand a bit, maybe to show that this was alright with him but Spock immediately froze. He knew by the way that Kirk was holding his hand gently, barely touching, that the captain knew about the significance of this gesture to Vulcans. McCoy, however, was holding his palm very tightly and had even shifted a bit to make the hold more comfortable, rubbing their palms together in the process. Spock closed his eyes for a second. As he opened them again and glanced at McCoy, the doctor was looking straight ahead.

“I thank you all for coming here today”, Hyralto said. He was standing on McCoy's other side: “Today we celebrate our victory over the Synthiard-Disease, thanks to our knowledgable and kind friends of the federation. Our planet would have been doomed but thanks to them, we look into a bright future! May we all remember this day as the day, our planet survived thanks to the kindness of strangers. And let us leave the grief and trouble behind us and start anew, cleansed by the flames and reborn through the fire. Ignite the pyre and let us be grateful!” Hyralto took a step forwards and accepted a burning torch that was handed to him. The flames were different than what they knew from earth, instead of yellow and orange they had a green tint to them. Even though it must be hot, the light emanating from them was rather cool.

With a great gesture, Hyralto threw the torch into the pyre that immediately started burning in the same fashion. “Say your thanks now and then lets celebrate!”

The people around them were turning towards each other, breaking the circle and taking both hands of their partner. Spock and McCoy did the same. It was again the Vulcan who took the human's other hand first. McCoy looked at him wide eyed, then swallowed. “I...Uhm, I suppose I ought to thank you for something now...”, he mumbled.

Spock was still focusing on the fact that he was holding both of McCoy's hands right now. The flickering light of the fire and the indirect lighting from all around them made the doctor's expression seem even softer. There was a question in his eyes, or maybe Spock was just imagining it. He wanted to give an answer but he didn't know how to.

“You really helped me in the last few days”, McCoy went on in a bit of an unsure voice. The sound of people softly talking to each other was all around them and Spock could vaguely hear Kirk praising Uhura's competence. But he tuned it all out in favour of the voice of the person in front of him. “I...Uhm, I probably couldn't have done it without you.” McCoy looked uncomfortable. Spock tried to squeeze his hands a bit but wasn't sure he had even moved a muscle. Then he saw McCoy smile.

“Your work was exceptional, as always”, Spock said: “Your kindness and compassion were admirable.”

Now, McCoy laughed and he actually looked happy for the first time in days. “Normally a weakness but now a strength, huh?”, he asked in a teasing voice that sounded way to happy for this purpose. “I only wish I had this on tape.”

Spock raised an eyebrow. “I could repeat it for you on the ship”, he offered: “But only if you also repeat your statement about me.”

McCoy made a vague rocking motion with his head. “Not very likely”, he said.

They still held eye contact and Spock couldn't help but notice the fond expression on McCoy's face. He wondered if the light softened his own features and if the contentment he felt was reflected in his expression in a way that McCoy could understand.

Suddenly music started from somewhere. A band was playing and the people around them started dancing. It was a triple metre. McCoy raised his eyebrows at Spock who nodded slightly. They both stepped forward, so that they ended up far closer than each of them had intended.

“Uh... sorry”, McCoy mumbled but Spock just placed his hand on the other man's shoulder blade and assumed a waltz dancing position.

“Shall we?”, he asked.

McCoy stared at him with an expression that seemed to be a mix of being terrified and excited. “Alright.”

They started moving. Carefully. Pushing and shoving each other, testing, until they found a rhythm. Spock took the lead and McCoy relaxed. When he felt particularly brave, he looked Spock in the eyes.

Neither of them noticed the looks they were getting from Uhura and Kirk, short glances and knowing smiles.

“I am counting on your discretion”, Kirk said quietly to her and Uhura smiled.

“Of course, Captain.”

It was actually nice. Who would have thought? Certainly not McCoy! He knew what Spock had said and he had been furious! But now. He could forget everything that had happened and just live in this moment, just enjoy what he was experiencing. Spock had been exceptionally kind to him just now and a silly little part of his heart actually dared to hope, dared to imagine that maybe Spock had meant it that way, the way McCoy had initially thought. If not with his words but with his actions, he seemed to tell him something.

BANG! McCoy's eardrums seemed to shatter. The left side of his face was hot and burning. Instinctively he raised his left hand to protect himself and felt a sharp pain rush through his fingers to the bone of his underarm. He wanted to scream but he couldn't hear himself over the noise all around him. It was so bright. He couldn't see.

“Spock!”, He screamed: “Where are you? Jim? Uhura?”

Suddenly it was dark. There was a ringing in his ears and some wetness on his cheek. He wanted to touch it but winced as the fingers of his left hand lit up with fiery hot pain. “AAAAH! Dammit!”, he cursed, biting his teeth together as another wave of pain shot through him. Then, out of nowhere, he felt a cold hand on his face.

“Spock?”, he whispered, his eyes only partially open but adjusting already to the changed lighting. He could see black eyes staring into his, open wide in shock. McCoy tried to reach out with his hand and touch him but it felt too heavy. Not only his hand, his whole body. He felt like he was underwater. His thoughts were swimming. “I'm sorry”, he mumbled and wasn't even sure if he was speaking at all or just thinking it: “This wasn't how I imagined our first date to go...” He heard voices, saw Spock turning abruptly, then everything went black.

He slowly came to his senses. His head was throbbing and his arm hurt even more than before. He instinctively wanted to raise his hand to feel his head but he couldn't move. Slowly, he registered his surroundings. It wasn't a very well illuminated place but there were certain, focused lights, creating more of a selective lighting than a general brightness. The walls and furniture were dark and they had a clean look to them. There were several shimmering objects that looked like surgical equipment.

McCoy tried to move again but now felt the restraints that prevented him from doing so. He was lying on a flat surface and all parts of his body were apparently fixed to it with straps. A sharp pain shot through his left arm but when he tried to look at it, he wasn't able to lift his head.

“Ah, you're awake”, a voice that he had never heard before said and McCoy turned his head slightly to the right. Someone stood next to him, a native of the planet, clad all in black. “We brought you here to get some answers and you will give them to us.” He smiled but it wasn't friendly, more a showing of teeth than anything else.

“Who are you?”, McCoy said, more angry than afraid.

The stranger took a step closer. “Oh, don't worry. You're going to get to know me very thoroughly in the next few hours.”

“What is this!?” Again, McCoy tried to fight against his restraints and again the only result was more pain.

“Doctor?” It was Spock's voice and McCoy immediately felt relieved but also anxious at the same time. He was glad that he wasn't alone but he didn't want Spock in danger as well!

He saw him now, slightly to his right at the other end of the room, in a contraption that seemed to be the same McCoy found himself in, arms, legs and head fixed to a black, horizontal table.

“Spock! How are you? Are you alright?”

“He is fine, Doctor.” The stranger answered but McCoy's eyes were still fixed on his friend.

“I am fine”, Spock said: “But you need medical attention.”

“Shut up!” The unknown person snapped. “You are going to tell us everything you know about your evil plan, right now!”

Suddenly, McCoy noticed even more people in the room. There were at least three others, lurking in the shadows, waiting.

“What plan?”, McCoy enquired. This was all still very confusing to him.

The stranger stepped closer. “Don't try to fool us, Doctor”, he said: “We know that you planted this disease here to gain control over our planet, to inject us all with some substance that will turn us into your mindless slaves.”

Now McCoy was truly baffled. “What?”, he said: “Where did you get that from?”

Spock, of course, had a more calm reply. “What you are suggesting is very illogical.” McCoy could hear the strain in his voice and wondered if the Vulcan was in pain too. “The federation is a peaceful alliance that does not use slaves.”

“...Is what you want us to think!”, the stranger snapped: “But your real motives are very different! In reality, you go from world to world and enslave their people, you brainwash them to use them for your purposes...”

“Every alliance with a foreign world is purely voluntary”, Spock interjected: “Our peaceful mission forbids conquest and....” He abruptly stopped talking and grit his teeth together. Not a sound escaped his lips but the expression of pain was clear on his features. Someone who had stood next to him, had rammed a short but sharp object into his side. Thankfully, nowhere near his heart.

“Leave him alone!”, McCoy shouted without thinking. A wave of cold shock ran through his body. He tried freeing himself once more but the only result again was pain.

The stranger looked pleased and it made McCoy feel sick. “Not until he has told us everything.”

“Why him?”, McCoy sensed an opening and took it: “I'm the doctor, what does he have to do with everything?”. He still sounded angry more than anything else and his captor seemed amused by that.

“He helped you. Whatever it is in that cure that is supposed to turn us into your mindless slaves, he will have developed it. Why else would a scientist assist a doctor with the so called 'cure'?”

McCoy rolled his eyes exasperatedly. “Because medicine is a science, you dumbass!”

“Doctor,” Spock sounded out of breath: “Please don't anger these people and worsen our situation.”

“Worsen!?”, McCoy spat out: “I don't see how this could get any worse than it already is!”

“Enough!” The stranger did seem angry now. Suddenly, he turned, looking at Spock, as if his remark had made him aware of his presence again. “You will tell us everything you know, or your partner will die.”

Silence. Spock, apparently, didn't have a logical answer to that. But that's what friends were for, right? McCoy let out a bitter laugh. “I'm not his partner”, he said: “We're barely even friends. I'm sorry to disappoint you all like this, but... you got the wrong guy.”

“Oh, I don't think so.” The stranger was still looking at Spock, fixing him with his sharp gaze. “We watched you at that ceremony, before our bomb detonated and I am sure we got exactly the right person.”

“Hey!”, McCoy screamed, trying to get the attention back. He could absolutely not read the expression on Spock's face right now, the only thing that he knew was, that it was no pleasant one. “Your people reading skills must be as bad as your knowledge of science!”

He didn't know why he was so angry, or maybe he did and didn't want to acknowledge it but the next words their kidnapper spoke, immediately replaced that anger with fear. “Would you please shut him up?”

McCoy's head shot to the side as someone approached him. “Hey!”, he protested: “Leave me alone! Don't touch me!” He tried to resist but couldn't, panic and pain washing over him as his left arm and hand got caught and held back by the straps again. Even his head would not move and then, he couldn't speak any more. Something had been placed over his mouth. He tried to open it but whatever it was got inside and he could not move or get it out and it was so much worse!

Spock heard the sounds McCoy was making and his muscles tensed up even more. He doubted their captors knew of the exact strength that he possessed as a half Vulcan. With a bit of effort, he could surely get out of these constraints.

The apparent leader, who was the only one who had spoken to them yet, approached the doctor but he was still speaking to Spock. “I saw you look at him”, he said: “At his eyes in particular. He does have beautiful, blue eyes, doesn't he?” He smiled and the fire that had been burning in Spock ever since he had regained consciousness flared up and filled his whole body with heat. The restraints cut into his flesh but he hardly noticed.

“You will tell me everything you know or you will never see those eyes again.”

“There is nothing to tell”, Spock reiterated but his voice was very constrained. Speaking took his focus away from his efforts of freeing himself. “The federation has no secret plan. We do not mean to enslave you. It is a totally illogic assertion.”

“Really?”

“Yes!” Spock allowed his muscles to relax for a moment to gather new strength. “Just look at this logically: If we already had the means to infect you with an unknown disease, why would we not have infected you with this mind control serum you claim we have in the first place? Why take a detour by creating the disease before?”

Their captor simply shrugged. “Maybe you did not create the disease, maybe you just used it for your purposes?”

This must be it, Spock thought a lapse of logic he could work with. “So, you are not sure?”, he asked: “You claim that we created the disease but are not certain of it. How can you then be certain of our plan?”

Apparently, logic did not work on this individual. “I will not fall for your lies”, he retorted in a self assured tone: “I want the truth, now! Or your partner here will loose an eye!”

McCoy screamed but it was muffled by the black fabric over his mouth. Spock could feel it in his whole body again, the heat rushing through his veins. He would not let that happen!

“So”, the stranger said: “What shall it be?”

“Everything I have told you is the truth”, Spock said in a final attempt at reasoning: “If you harm us in any way you are committing an act of violence against the federation.”

For a moment, the leader looked at him with almost pity but there was hatred too. “It's such a shame that you are this stubborn”, he said, turning around. The person who had put the gag on McCoy handed him something that looked like a spoon and also a seemingly glowing piece of metal. Spock couldn't see it clearly but he knew what it was for, knew what was going to happen.

Their captor shot him another glance with a devious gleam in his eyes. “You see, you have to be careful when removing an eye. At least that's what I've heard. So that the person does not bleed to death. I have never done it before so it will be interesting for the both of us. Any final words?”

“Don't do this!”, Spock answered. His voice was strained and breathless. He could feel the restraints boring into his flesh: “Please!”

“All you have to do to save him is to give me the answer I want.”

Spock contemplated. He could lie to save McCoy, buy them time until Kirk found them. But would this unstable individual really stop if he admitted to the imagined wrongdoings?

“Time's up.” The statement rang in Spock's ears: “If your friend survives this, he will never forgive you.” With that, their captor turned away, towards McCoy.

Spock couldn't see him, couldn't see McCoy's eyes that must have been full of fear. He couldn't let them do this. He had to stop it, he had to...

McCoy screamed.

Spock shut his eyes. There was a horrible sound and a horrible smell, a sizzling noise and even more screams. Every muscle in Spock's body tensed.

It took all the strength he had and even some he didn't know he had. The fabric tore, metal got bent out of shape. The person next to him screamed but a moment later lay unconscious on the floor. Two people tried to attack him but he was strong and the heat in his body had blinded him. Two strokes and they were down. He didn't even use the nerve pinch.

The leader of the bunch turned around, his hands bloody. He made a motion as if to swing the hot iron like a weapon but Spock had him in his grip before he could even blink. He applied a lot of pressure, more than necessary and the man sank to the floor. Spock gripped his hand that was still holding the spoon-like object to make sure that it's contents did not touch anything. When he looked around with some sharp movements of his head, there was no one in the room who was still standing but that didn't mean that they were out of danger.

Immediately, he turned his head to look at McCoy again. With his left, free hand he removed the gag from the doctor's mouth, as well as the rest of the restraints.

Half of McCoy's face was covered in blood but you could also see some burn marks where the hot iron had touched him. Even though the bleeding itself seemed to have already decreased, blood was still running down the side of the table and dripping on the floor.

“Doctor?”, Spock said quietly but not indistinctly. He touched McCoy's shoulder but did not dare shake him. “Doctor”, he repeated.

Slowly, McCoy's right eye opened. He looked dazed, unfocused. Spock tried to direct his attention towards himself by leaning in slightly. “Doctor”, he said: “It is very important that you tell me how to help you. What can I do?”

McCoy still didn't really look at him. He closed his eye. His breath was shallow, his voice very weak but there was a certain determination in his tone. “Get some bandages... Fluids...and...” He took a deeper breath: “Put the eye in a jar if you see one. A clean jar... show me some...” McCoy stopped. “Show me some and I'll tell you which is the right one...Fluids”, he added.

Spock immediately went to work. He walked around the room methodically, identifying a clean jar and carefully placing the contents of the spoon he had been holding in it. There was a small cabinet with bags that looked like they contained various fluids. He brought some to McCoy and held them close to his right eye so that he could read them. Thankfully, he had worked with the doctors on this planet closely enough so that he could identify them. He pointed one out and Spock filled the little jar with it before putting on the lid. Another two, he grabbed along with a needle and a translucent tube. The bandages he found quickly in another cupboard. While he was roaming around, the two guys he had knocked out earlier came to their senses for a moment but he took care of that with a proper nerve pinch this time. He put everything he had gathered on a blanket and tied the ends together before threading his arm through the resulting loop and wearing it like a bag.

“We have to go”, he said to McCoy: “Staying here would be dangerous.”

“You know, for once”, McCoy muttered: “I agree.”

Spock walked over to him and leaned down so that McCoy could hold on to his shoulder with his right hand. Once he was in a sitting position, Spock put his own arm around the doctor and lifted him from the horizontal surface. McCoy was very light, at least to the Vulcan and even though he was very unsure on his feet, Spock could support his body with ease.

They walked to the only door in the room and opened it. Before them was a corridor.

Spock turned his head to McCoy. “I have to leave you here for a moment while I investigate this building. I will be back as soon as possible.”

McCoy nodded. “Alright.”

He was gently let down to sit on the ground. His head was spinning from the blood loss. Normally, you would raise a person's legs when they were anaemic to make the blood flow to the brain but you would also raise the part of their body that was injured to prevent further bleeding, in this case his head. So, McCoy lay down, raised his legs slightly by bending them and placed his right arm under his head. Then he focused on staying awake. He heard some commotion at some point but in his head, everything sounded different. There was a throbbing in his skull and the pain drowned out all his thoughts. He turned his head from one side to the other as if to shake it off but all that did was make him even more dizzy.

“Doctor”, he suddenly heard Spock's voice, felt a strong hand on his shoulder.

“I'm here”, he mumbled.

Spock got him up again. To say that he was supporting him was a stretch. He was basically carrying him at this point. McCoy tried to focus but the pain in his head was too loud. He let Spock drag him through the building and outside. The wind was cold on his skin and he really felt the wetness on his face for the first time. Weird. Had he been crying?

There was faint light all around him but he could not really focus on anything. His vision was very blurry. Spock, however, seemed to know where they were going, walking in determined steps, carrying McCoy with him.

He had no idea how long they went on in this manner but suddenly, Spock stopped. McCoy was let down on the ground again but he stayed in a sitting position this time, leaning against the trunk of a tree. Spock was rummaging around in the equipment he had brought but McCoy had his eye closed. He breathed in the fresh air and tried to focus on that. At least the cold was good for his head. He got the feeling, he would be able to think again in just a moment.

Spock had opened the makeshift bag and taken some of the utensils out that he had gathered. “With your permission”, he said: “I will clean your face now and apply the bandages.” His voice sounded heavy and grave.

“Yes”, McCoy said. He was still so dizzy. Spock went to work.

With a moist bandage, he wiped off the blood that had started to dry on the left side of McCoy's face. He was very careful not to let any liquid drip on the doctor's uniform. Since the doctor had been lying down it had remained untarnished so far.

“You can”, McCoy said weakly: “Place one thicker piece of bandage on the wound and then wrap the rest around my head like... like this.” He made a gesture, indicating a diagonal line. Spock nodded. He was again very careful and McCoy grit his teeth to not let any sound escape him. But it was painful nonetheless. As Spock was done, McCoy breathed in a sigh of relief. “My left hand as well”, he said: “I think it's been burned.”

The cold was getting under his skin now. Soon he would be shivering. As soon as Spock was finished. McCoy ordered him to hand him the bag with fluids and the needle. To do this all in his weakened condition, with only one eye was no problem. McCoy had done it a hundred times over. Soon the needle was in his right arm and the bag hanging on the tree. McCoy sighed. “I'm cold”, he said.

Spock sat down next to him. They looked at each other for only a moment, then Spock got closer and put his arm around McCoy. He was warm and the doctor leaned in.

They sat like this for a moment, simply breathing. McCoy's mind started to clear but the throbbing in his head only worsened. “You got hurt too”, he suddenly remembered: “You need to put a bandage on that.”

Spock didn't move. “It's barely noticeable.”

“Please.”

Now, Spock got up again. He lifted parts of his uniform but McCoy could barely see anything from his position and couldn't really tell if he was hurt badly or not before Spock applied a bandage to himself.

“We should move”, McCoy said, while feeling like he could sit here for ever and never get up: “We need to get back to the ship. Why have they not located us?”

Adjusting his uniform again, Spock sat down next to McCoy, leaning against the tree trunk. “It is probable that they are unable to”, he stated: “These mountains seem to generate some interference. That is why we could not beam directly to the mountaintop before and beaming someone up without a clear signal should be even more difficult.”

“Hm”, McCoy scoffed: “Why is it that these damn transporters are always getting interference when we need them most?”

“That statement is statistically untrue.”

McCoy smiled. “Please give me no further details”, he said.

They sat there in silence for a moment and McCoy noticed that Spock had not put his arm around him again. He could not blame him. Even the short amount of time before must have cost him some significant willpower. He turned his head to look at Spock. The Vulcan's face was close and so he could see him fairly well.

“It wasn't your fault”, McCoy said but this remark seemed to make Spock tense up even more instead of calming him. “There was nothing you could have done.”

When Spock answered, his voice sounded very sharp. “Incorrect. There were exactly 46 other possible scenarios with better outcomes.”

McCoy sighed. “Why am I even trying...”

By now, Spock looked at him too. His eyes apparently searching for something in his face. “There is a way in which I could help you, with your permission”, he stated: “I cold initiate a mind meld and take away some of your pain.”

The earnest look on his face surprised McCoy. He knew what an intimate experience a mind meld could be and did not expect an offer of that kind.

“I don't know”, he said, looking away: “It's probably not a good idea.”

The silence was heavy but McCoy still looked anywhere but at Spock. How was he supposed to explain this?

When Spock spoke again, McCoy persuaded himself that he sounded a bit constrained, like he needed to hold himself back from revealing anything. “May I ask the reason for this assertion?”

“No.” McCoy lowered his head. “You may not.” His wound was still throbbing with pain and he cursed himself in his head for being such an idiot! How wonderful it would have been, if Spock could have just stretched out his hand and taken this pain away from him. But he could not risk it, melding his thoughts with the Vulcan, not in his current state.

“I am assuming”, Spock said very slowly as if he was choosing every word carefully: “That you are afraid I might sense something in your thoughts that you don't wish me to know?”

McCoy stayed silent. He didn't have the energy right now. “Can we discuss this later?”, he asked, afraid, that he already knew the answer to that question.

“So, you are affirming that there is something to discuss?”

McCoy grit his teeth but relaxed immediately as he felt a new flash of pain. How did he always get himself into these conversations? “Get the hint! I don't want to talk!” It came out sharper than he had intended but it always did, didn't it?”

Nevertheless, Spock continued in the same manner as he had previously, with seeming hesitation before every word. “Would it ease your mind in any way if I told you that what you want to keep secret doesn't have to remain so? That me knowing about it would not have any negative repercussions? Quite the contrary, actually.”

At that, McCoy turned his head, looking into Spock's eyes again. His heart started beating faster but he had to hold himself back. Maybe he was getting this all wrong. “How could you possibly know that?”, he demanded.

“You said something to me”, Spock answered earnestly: “Before you fell into a state of unconsciousness, that lets me to believe you have some...” He suddenly stopped. When he continued, his voice was darker. “...personal feelings towards me. My suspicions were reinforced by the manner in which you reacted to our captors. But If I have drawn the wrong conclusions, I apologise.”

He didn't know what to say. All McCoy could do was to stare at Spock his brain somehow disconnected from his mouth. His heart was beating very fast, amplifying the drumming sound in his head. “What did I say?”, he finally got out.

Spock's expression had changed very subtly. He now looked like he was analysing some data that left him without a clear result, except that that data was McCoy. “You said that you had imagined our first date differently which leads me to the conclusion that you have imagined such a scenario before. You also responded very defensively to the idea of me being your partner which supports the notion that you feel strongly about this subject. Regarding your first remark, the conclusion would be that these feelings are somewhat positive despite your denial which seems paradox in itself.”

“Right.”

“There is also some data from before. From the dance for example.”

“Great!” McCoy said blankly: “You've chosen the perfect time to discuss this.”

“We have to discuss this now”, Spock remarked: “It is only logical since I am able to help you but misinformation is keeping me from it.”

“Misinformation?”, McCoy repeated. There was a hint of anger in his voice but he was too weak to work himself up like he usually did. “That's what you call it?” He was afraid to look at Spock but he did it anyway. It was dark but the glimmer in the air allowed him to see Spock's face clearly.

“You seem to be of the impression that your feelings towards me would be a cause of embarrassment for you”, Spock went on: “But this is not the case.”

McCoy's eye shot to the floor again. “Really? What if you're wrong?”

“If I interpreted things incorrectly, I apologise.”

There was a pause. McCoy could feel Spock's gaze on him. “What was your interpretation exactly?” He asked.

“I have already told you.”

“Not really...”

Another pause.

“You only talked about personal feelings.” McCoy still looked towards the ground: “What do you mean exactly?” It was impressive how calm he was, at least that's what he himself thought. Maybe he had lost more blood than he had initially estimated...

McCoy let his gaze wander. This was truly a beautiful planet. At least that's what he had thought when he had spend his first day here, or rather, his first night. Too bad, he couldn't really appreciate it now. The view across the valley was incredible from atop these mountains.

Suddenly, he realised that Spock was not answering. McCoy turned his head, looked at him again. The faint light, the shimmer in the air, made Spock's features look softer. His expression was unreadable. “Maybe I was wrong”, he said. There was something is his eyes but only there.

They looked at each other. Both waiting for something to happen, another force, a third party to help them get over this, whatever this was. They both felt the urge to talk but they stayed silent.

Light was reflecting on their faces. This was a magical place for sure.

“May I help ease your pain?”, Spock finally asked.

McCoy felt frozen, turned into stone. The only thing that was moving was his mouth when he said: “Yes.”

Spock reached for McCoy's face, the side that was not covered in bandages. His fingertips brushed at the doctor's jaw and cheekbone, very lightly running over his skin until Spock had found the right position. They closed their eyes at the same time.

Relieve was the first thing that McCoy felt. The throbbing in his head got lighter, the pain faded. He took a deep breath.

There was something else. He felt something, fire buried under calm, uneasiness. It might have been his own. Longing.

“Do you feel it?”, McCoy asked.

“I do.”

“So you don't make my pain disappear, you just shift it onto yourself?”

Silence. Something stirring in the bond between them. _That's not what I meant._ Was it a feeling or a thought? And from whom of them was it coming?

McCoy didn't dare open his eye. He knew that Spock was looking at him, studying his face with some sort of... affection.

“Once the connection is established my hand doesn't need to remain on these contact points”, Spock said.

How was his voice so gentle? Maybe it was because McCoy could not only hear it but feel it too. Again, the fingertips were brushing over his face, moving down to where his neck started, brushing down the back of his neck. Spock's hand came to a rest there, gentle and light, his thumb still slightly touching the doctor's jawbone.

McCoy opened his eye. It was strange. He felt like he could see himself partly through Spock. The night seemed even brighter, his pain a faint memory in the back of his head.

“Is this more like you have imagined it?”, Spock asked and McCoy didn't know what he meant and knew at the same time and his heart began to race. He turned his head slightly, taking in his surroundings. Two pairs of eyes saw more than one and Spock had very special eyes. What he had been to tired to see or even notice, now shone brightly before him. The blossoms of the tree they were leaning against were reflecting the moonlight, small creatures akin to butterflies with transparent wings were shimmering, glistening like little stars. It was beautiful, the valley below them, the light all around them. He looked at Spock, at the light reflecting in the Vulcan's eyes. He smiled.

Warmth was spreading inside of him and he was sure that Spock must know, must feel what he was feeling. But it wasn't only him.

“Yes”, he said: “Although a real date would have something else.”

The Vulcan raised his eyebrow and for a brief moment something flashed through McCoy's mind, only a glimpse, a fraction of a second. He could feel himself blush and his smile widened. “No, I mean...” And he could do it too, create an image in the other's head. A picnic blanket and candles, right by the edge of the cliff. He was an old fool and a romantic.

“Dangerous”, Spock said.

McCoy chuckled. “Jim would probably say that all good things in life are.”

They exchanged a look, a mutual fondness of their friend.

“How about this?”, Spock asked. The colours around them became brighter. They were floating over the valley, sparkling blossoms everywhere and little creatures, the lake below them was glistening in the moonlight. It was otherworldly in the true meaning of the sense.

McCoy's eyes widened, full of wonder. “Beautiful”, he said.

Spock agreed. “It is.” But he was looking at him.

It was almost too much. Neither of them were used to this. McCoy felt himself open and vulnerable yet unafraid and Spock just allowed himself to be, in their mutual bond, let the emotions exist in this space between them.

“I would also like the other thing”, McCoy said: “What you were thinking about earlier.”

Spock's hand, that had been on his neck the whole time, moved down his shoulder, down his arm but stopped. There was still the infusion. McCoy froze. All of this had almost made him forget. The Vulcan felt it to, he had to. Their minds were still connected.

Carefully, Spock took his other hand, the one that was bandaged. “Does it still hurt?”, He asked.

McCoy shook his head. It didn't. His pain was gone and suddenly he realised what that meant. Before he could even say it, the thought had transferred, along with his feelings. _You don't have to._

But his panic was met with calm, soothing, like a band-aid for his mind. _I want to._

And there was something else he wanted, something McCoy could only feel and if it had been said, he wouldn't have believed it.

Very carefully, Spock raised the doctor's hand and placed a kiss on his fingertips, so light you could hardly feel it but McCoy could feel it, deep inside of him and his emotional response made Spock's eyes widen. His mind was stumbling, only for a moment, the bond between them trembling.

“I'm sorry”, McCoy said but Spock almost imperceptibly shook his head.

“Don't be.”

He moved closer, looking at McCoy, checking. But he didn't really need his eyes to know. He could feel the doctor's heartbeat in his own chest, could feel the excitement, the longing, the disbelieve. Again, he stretched out his hand to touch the other man's face, gently caressing his skin with his fingertips.

He couldn't keep up with it, what he was feeling himself and what was projected. It was all the same now anyway. When their lips finally met, it was unlike anything either of them had ever experienced.

_I love you_

McCoy was pretty sure that this thought came from him and he could feel himself blush severely. The echo in Spock's mind, however, was incredible. Thoughts and pictures were flashing through him, way too fast but he somehow caught all of them and then a warmth spread in his chest unlike anything he had felt before.

When they separated, Spock's eyes were shining, not only because of the surrounding lights.

“Glad we cleared up that misinformation”, McCoy said.

“Indeed.”

McCoy smiled. There was so much he wanted to say but he could feel that Spock already knew. They looked at each other for a moment.

“You should rest”, Spock said: “You are exhausted. Tomorrow we will find our way back to the ship.”

“Alright.”

He immediately missed the warmth as Spock withdrew his hand from his face but soon the Vulcan's arm was around him again, pulling him close and holding him securely. McCoy leaned in, rested his head on Spock's shoulder. The connection between them had stayed in tact and he could feel the calm seep into his mind.

“Sleep”, Spock said, his voice very gentle: “I will protect you through the night.”

“Such a hero”, McCoy said jokingly but he knew full well that he could not hide his real feelings at the moment. He felt safe in Spock's arms and he was indeed exhausted. His knowledge that Vulcan's didn't need that much sleep also helped him relax. “Good night, Spock”, he mumbled.

“Good night, doctor.”

“And thank you!”

“You're welcome. As Always.”

His dreams were very vague that night and he barely remembered any of it. It was mostly colours and shapes and a feeling of home that stayed in his mind when he woke up.

McCoy was a woken by a slight nudge to his shoulder. “Hmm...”, he grumbled. It was not a nice awakening. His head felt stuffed, heavy, like there was no room to think. Pain was shooting through him again and he grit his teeth. That must mean that the bond between them had been broken.

Carefully, he started blinking against the bright light and realised that the nudging he had felt earlier had been Spock withdrawing his arm from around McCoy's body. He was standing next to him now and there were other people too.

“Good to see you, Captain”, he heard Spock say and a weird feeling spread in his chest, relief for sure but also something else. Disappointment?

His eye had accommodated to the light and he could see Jim too now, walking towards him, dropping down to his knees. His face looked very torn between worry, guilt and relieve.

“Bones”, his voice was warm. “How are you? What happened?” His hand touched McCoy's shoulder.

“Some sick bastards tortured us”, he responded, his voice still heavy with sleep: “Spock got hurt too, don't let him tell you otherwise...”

Jim shot a quick look at The Vulcan. “Alright”, he said, getting out his communicator still in the kneeling position. The familiar buzzing sound felt like music in McCoy's ears. “We found them, six ready to beam up.”

It was all a bit surreal, being back on the ship, being escorted to sickbay by Jim who would refuse to let ho of his arm until he was lying down on one of the beds. He could see Spock getting a similar treatment but his wound would be healed considerably faster.

They had brought the eye but there was no real hope of reattaching it. In all honesty, McCoy didn't remember why he had wanted to take it with him. Maybe because it had been his since birth which was a very weird thought.

M'Benga was the one treating him and McCoy made a mental note to himself that he should probably apologise after everything was said and done for being such an annoying patient, even though his colleague was actually very kind and didn't complain.

First, they healed his burned hand with the anabolic protoplaser, which was not a big deal. His eye, on the other hand, would take a bit more than that. They had pills that grew back organs but the eyes were very special, stemming from the same tissue as the brain and he would need to be supervised throughout the whole process to make sure nothing went wrong. _Brilliant!_ , McCoy thought.

Spock was up and running very fast and soon he and the Captain left to get in contact with Hyralto again. McCoy had temporarily forgotten about all of that. The ball and the dance seemed like an eternity ago.

The doctor, however, had to stay in sickbay, pestering everyone around him for updates, until Chappel gave him a slight sedative. "You'll feel better shortly", she said with a smile that was very kind and he could not really blame her for making him groggy.

He only realised that he had fallen asleep when he woke up again. Spock was sitting next to his bed.

McCoy looked at him. His own left eye was still covered in bandages but Spock sat to his right so that he could see him easily. He turned his head to quickly glance around the room. They were alone.

"Hey", he said, not really sure how to proceed. They had shared their minds, they had kissed but Spock also had taken his arm away as soon as other people had approached them. What was McCoy supposed to make of this all now that they were back, back to normal, so to speak?

"How are you, doctor?", Spock asked. His face looked serious, tense and McCoy could feel himself tense up as well.

"Better", he said and it was true. He was not feeling pain, this time due to medication.

It was very quiet. At least as quiet as it could be with several medical apparatuses running at the moment. There was never real quiet in sickbay. Once you got used to it, you barely noticed.

"I was instructed to alert staff if your condition worsened", Spock informed him.

"Right."

Another silence.

McCoy took a deep breath. "Why did you come here?"

Spock looked at him, his face an expressionless mask. "I can leave if you want me to. There is other staff available."

McCoy grit his teeth. Why was this so hard? It shouldn't be but it somehow always was with them.

"That's not what I asked", McCoy replied. His voice sounded very tired but he really was tired of all of it. "I asked you why you are here? I'm sure there are more important things that require your attention."

"Not to me, no."

"Ah."

They were examining each other's faces, waiting for a clue, just as they had done down on the planet, before the mind melt.

"This is ridiculous", McCoy stated: "I..." He turned his right hand around, the one on the side where Spock was sitting, so that his palm was facing upwards. "I didn't dream all of that, did I?"

Spock moved closer and took McCoy's hand in his own. Their palms were touching, rubbing against each other for a moment, warm and familiar.

"No", Spock said: "You didn't."

This small gesture of affection made the doctor relax. Hopefully, nobody walked in right now. His eyes wandered through the room, not looking at the Vulcan.

"You let go of me", he said without really thinking about it: "When Jim found us, you let go."

"I know." Spock's tone was heavy, his voice quite low. "I apologise." With that, McCoy's eyes snapped back to the other's face. Spock still looked tense but maybe now for different reasons. "I wanted to make sure what this was before making it known to everyone else. But I hurt your feelings, which was not my intention."

McCoy could feel the smile spread across his face, a warmth that had started out in his chest and made it's way up. "It's alright", he said "For me, there really is not much to discuss. You know how I feel about you..."

"I do", Spock replied. "And I reciprocate." It took him much effort to say this, McCoy could see that, so the fact that he actually did was miraculous. He could feel his own heart rate going up and also hear it in the change of sounds around him.

Spock immediately froze and focused on the displays. "Are you alright?", he asked: "Are you in distress?"

His serious tone made McCoy laugh, he gently stroked the back of Spock's hand with his thumb. “I'm not in distress”, he said: “I... I'm in love.” The cheesiness made him smile even more and he shook his head.

Spock raised his eyebrow at him. “I see”, he replied: “If my presence has this effect on you, I should maybe remove myself from sickbay.” There was a hint of teasing in his eyes.

McCoy tightened his grip. “Don't you dare!”

They looked at each other for a moment but this time it wasn't tense. McCoy only now realised that Spock was wearing his normal uniform again. Of course he was but for some reason it made all of this more real. Here Spock sat, in his normal science blue shirt, right beside McCoy's bed, holding his hand.

“We have to have a serious talk soon”, McCoy said. They were both too old and reasonable to just 'see where things were going' and he had a feeling that it wasn't an option for Spock anyway.

“Indeed”, Spock agreed: “Maybe we could address a few matters on another 'date' as you call it.

“Another?”, McCoy raised his brow at Spock: “I don't think getting kidnapped and tortured counts...”

“Don't worry, Leonard”, Spock replied and the use of his first name made McCoy feel warm in his chest: “Even if the first one was suboptimal, we can still have a perfect second date and third and as many as you wish after that.”

“Yes”, McCoy answered: “I think I can accept that.”

Their conversation drifted to something else after that. Spock informed him how Jim had caught the terrorists and how well the antidote was being transmitted. McCoy mostly listened. He liked the sound of Spock's voice.

When Jim walked in at some point to check on them. Spock's hand stayed in its place, right in McCoy's. As soon as he noticed, a small smile spread across his face.

**Author's Note:**

> Art by Lumesati! Art post link here [here](https://lumesatii.tumblr.com/post/641038088489009152/this-is-my-contribution-for-the-sponesrbb-2020) :)
> 
> Go and check out their other amazing drawings!


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